Tuesday, December 15, 2009

The Dreaded Kirby Vacuum Salesman

After a very unfortunate incident about two years ago with a Kirby Vacuum, I had vowed that when the salesmen came to my house I would scream at them, "You ruin marriages!", slam the door and go hide under the bed.

I did not realize that the Kirby people would also be in Minnesota. They kind of tricked me by signing me up for a free raffle ticket for food. Who knew?

By then, because it was cold, they were in my house. Then they asked the question, "can we clean your carpet." I told them I have two rugs and hardwood floors. "Oh, but can he just do this demonstration. He wont' pressure you at all." Stoopid me.

So I let the guy do his demonstration. He kept vacuuming one of my area rugs and showing me the grossness that the Kirby Vacuum was pulling out of the carpet. He lay out all the little circular pieces that had dust, cat hair, and crumbs.

Then he started asking if I would like to buy a Kirby. "No."

Then he would show me something else this miraculous vacuum does. "Would you like to buy a Kirby?" "No."

He finally asked me why not. I told him that Kirby vacuums ruin marriages. So now he is thinking that my husband, Kelly, is some sort of controlling freak. It was actually quite funny.

He then again showed me all the gunk that his Kirby had pulled out of my carpet. "Even if you could get this out of your carpet every time you vacuum, you wouldn't buy a Kirby? I don't think I could live in a house that had this much stuff coming out of the carpets and couches."

I looked at him, with a smile on my face, and said, "This is life. Life is cat hair, crumbs, and dirt."

After he left, I emptied out my vacuum bag and vacuumed where he had. Stuff still came out of my carpet. Maybe I just need a new carpet. No. I like life. Life is enjoyable and dirty.


Jamie said...

That was an awesome blog post. Seriously, you could write a book and call it "Life is enjoyable and dirty." I would buy it from you!

aprilinsalt said...

Your post are really great lately!!

AshMasta said...

I don't think I could loathe door to door salesmen of any kind more than I loathe the Kirby vacuum salesmen. Love your post!

Anonymous said...

I love my Kirby vacuum it cleans very well I dont like living in dirt of any kind my Grandmother still has hers it over 40 years old and still working well. Live in your dirt and really get a life